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Remember that this isn’t him coming on your trip—it’s the two of you traveling together, which is a big ol’ metaphor for your lives off the trail.

From now on, when he tells you about what he’s learning, you’re going to be open and grateful and trust him. And if, after all this, he’s still geeking out over gear and new toys? Q: What advice would you give to (queer) women camping alone or in pairs?

That’s archaic, sure, but it’s also probably real for him in ways you don’t even realize.

Here’s a chance for you to assess your own biases as well. But if that question stings—even a little—take some time to process that patriarchal bullcrap and get it out of your system.

Here are some of the lessons I've learned about loving my spouse even in the tough times.

Tough Love: Dating and Relationships in the Outdoors JZr0P Welcome to Tough Love.

I hate that you were threatened, that the integrity of your space and body were put at risk, that your sense of security in the wilderness was compromised.Your guy wants to contribute, and maybe you’re not making space for him to do it in his own way.Maybe he’s losing little bits of himself to fit in during your Big Wilderness Adventure.And I’m guessing—or projecting—that you’re kinda proud of that.Let’s call this what it is: garden-variety insecurity on his part (and possibly yours).

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Though my husband, Steve, and I recently celebrated our twenty-sixth wedding anniversary, our marriage hasn't been filled with the wedded bliss you might expect from such a committed couple.

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